‘The Coney Nazi’

I could easily become … ‘The Coney Nazi’.

Ali “Al” Yeganeh’s inspiration for Larry Thomas’s ‘Soup Nazi’ on the 116th episode of Seinfeld was brutal. Ask the character for bread, and either pay for it, or …

… “No soup for you!!!” … and out you go.

I could easily do that with the Flint coneys I make each and every day for dozens of customers.

See, I make the sauce almost every morning, from scratch. I make sure they’re served on good buns … not expensive buns, just buns that won’t separate at the seam, won’t flake apart, and won’t collapse under a pile of warm sauce. I make sure the sauce is made from the right ingredients every time … and that the hot dogs underneath are indeed Koegel’s.

So it makes me kinda nuts when someone comes up to the window and starts with, “I’ll take a chili dog …”

Ummm … excuse me … but …

What did you say???

No. It’s NOT a chili dog. A chili dog has flippin’ chili on it. This ain’t no chili. No, it’s not “beanless chili” either. Yeah, there’s chili powder in there, but it ain’t no chili. Does my menu say “Chili Dog”? What about the big sign out front on the lawn? Is “chili” spelled anywhere on it??

It says “Flint Coney“. So …

No dog for you!!!

How ’bout some mustard on that? Ketch-… what? Ketchup?? You wanna put ketchup on that? And relish … and … no onion???

Listen bub, a real Flint coney has mustard on it and chopped onion. No ketchup and certainly no relish! What’s that? Jalapeños? And nacho cheese?? On a Flint coney??

No dog for you!!!

I blame Packo’s. I like Packo’s, and eat there cuz their food is cool. I still blame them though.

I can do that … because … I am become … The Coney Nazi.

Order it right. Otherwise, ya’ better watch yer buns.

Apologies to Seinfeld. Yeah, like he needs apologies or sumthin’ …


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  1. OK, I’ll bite (pun intended) what is a Flint Coney Dog???

    I am a hot dog lover.

    When I lived in California, I would have family and friends that visited me to make the “pilgrimage” to Monroe’s Original Hot Dog Stand on East Front St and bring the “fixings’ for a dozen dogs to me in the Bay Area.

    When I was a kid, my dad would load me and my three brothers into his 1954 two-toned Ford Coupe for hot dogs and an A&W root beer the first night the stand opened. It was a rite of spring!

    My son, who lives in California, absolutely craves the Monroe Originals! When he comes for a visit, we have to stop by the stand before we get to our house if “the stand” is open!

    If a Flint Coney comes close to the Monroe Original — sign me up — give me a recipe at best — a place to buy and try at the least!

  2. @Maxx, you can download my recipe here. My own story about these things is in there. And if you print it double-sided, it folds up nicely for storage. We’re serving Flint Coneys this summer at the beachhouse here in Luna Pier … I-75, exit 6 in Michigan, drive east 1/2 mile till you run out of land. Big blue building … you can’t miss it.

    People invariably ask, “What is a Flint Coney Dog???”, just like you when they see the sign. My reply is that a Flint Coney was developed in the 1930’s at Angelo’s in Flint, where they recently changed the recipe and don’t really serve the real thing anymore. It’s a drier sauce than people are used to around here … it’s ground chuck, ground-up Koegel Viennas (with the natural casing), a little butter, a little mustard, some garlic … that’s when they decide they want to try it. It should be served on a grilled Koegel Vienna, but I’d have to charge a higher price so I serve it on Koegel’s Skinless Frankfurters instead, with customers coming back to tell us how good it is.

  3. Your admonition reminds me of the days of the “Ollie Burger” back in Louisville, Kentucky.

    I really liked Ollie Burgers, but sometimes I thought that an adjustment or two might be in order for a particular culinary mood.

    WRONG!, I was quickly told.

    “If we change it, it’s not an ‘Ollie Burger’ and we only sell ‘Ollie Burgers’! “).

    “Take it the way we make it or leave”, I was told . . . and they were NOT kidding.

    Ironically, I am still around, but I think “Ollie Burger” is long gone.

  4. Can’t say that I have ever eaten a Coney Dog…but this could be the summer 🙂 btw, terrific post!

  5. Old Millington Guy

    Dave, there is a state law that permits only mustard and onions on coney dogs. There’s also a pretty steep fine if you add ketchup to that coney. Thought you might like to know that.

    Great post.

  6. OOPS, I stand corrected. I received several emails telling me that the “Ollie Burger” can still be found, but that it is now being sold by (what’s left of) the Lum’s chain instead of the original “Ollie’s Trolley.”

    I will have to investigate that info, for old time’s sake.

    Is “Old Millington Guy” kidding, or is there really such a law in Michigan?

  7. @DC … err, yeah Old Millington Guy is kidding! But now you can tell how us Flint Coney nuts feel about this. 😉

  8. Sorry friend, but onions scare me more than Nazis and Seinfeld. 😀

  9. @Nicole, at least you don’t want to top it with ketchup (urp) or relish (retch!)

  10. LPC you will be disgusted to hear this but…

    until this summer I thought a Coney Dog was really a “Corney Dog”, and the same thing as a corndog on a stick!

    So, I will NOT be challenging you to a hot dog cook off! That’s for sure!

  11. The Koegel hot dog is essential to the Flint Coney experience; I can’t imagine a coney without the quality Koegel. If you can’t get them locally, Maxx, order them online to be delivered. I was raised in Flint and instructed by my mom to “never eat a hot dog unless it’s a Koegel.” When I moved South for 8 years I didn’t eat a hot dog, except for one time when my mom sent me Koegels and a quart of Angelo’s coney sauce (on dry ice) for my birthday. I managed to find some Vernor’s and threw a Flint coney party for myself and some very lucky friends. YUM!

  12. I’ll have a Flint Chil…CONEY pullleeeeze!

  13. Archie MacGillivray

    Does not any of you “coney” people remember the old “Nigh Owl” across from the old AC Spark plug plant on Dort???? Man, that was the real thing as far as I am concerned. Angelos A. Night Owl A+!!!!

    Right On “Coney Nazi”!!!! I can relate to your “chili dog” take. From a “customer’s” perspective, I hate it when they advertise “Coney’s” only to find out it’s just a stink’in old chili dog. Man, what a bummer!!

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